yes, I, we only have one shot at life.  what is the purpose of our lives? do we have purpose?  I suppose it is to further the species, our species? or all species. The are launching a new Telescope today, which will be able to peer into the great beyond, the the big bang theory. I guess that is a step in the right direction as our Sun will burn out eventually, at least that is what we theorize. what do I have to do with all that? nothing comes to mind, but perhaps it is to not rock the boat?  or maybe it is to rock the boat, lets say, our current pollution and burn up the planet trajectory ends the earth long before the Sun has had a chance to burn out? Maybe a Nuclear war? I was watching some Geographic show about paleontology or more specifically Archeological paleontology, and  they were talking and digging up all the creatures that have inhabited our planet before we were part of the system, they are all extinct, perhaps God decided to make a new creature, in his own image? us. what if he tires of our inability to get the world a place of Eden? 🙂 anyway. I was worried about the whales, the polar bears and all the animals threatened by our burn up, pollute the planet mentality, but in reality, extinction is the natural course for most, except the tardigrade who will endure long after we have blown up the planet, perhaps the roach will also survive, but what is my role in all this? I think, to live a good life? yes of course, no reason to suffer for no reason, as this is far out of my control. I think to try to live a good honest life, to be a good person, even when the world around me has no interest in me or my good life, what is a good life?  well that can be subject to many factors, but for me it boils down to “wants” “EGO” and minimizing the Negatives. that is it, try to be a good person, you know, that is easy, but in whose eyes? my own or yours? Everything feels like a trap, a trick, life is one big trick or treat. lots of gold watches being displayed only to find a lead broken watch.  O O guess what, I found out an experiment.  it worked for me, perhaps It means, despite, my bleak look at our lives, I had an epiphany of sorts, ok so I was thinking, the kind where you brow furls and your brain strains for an answer, well at this moment, I decided to just feel happy, without any external stimuli, without creating a thought, it worked, for no reason but to feel happy, I have since done it at will. this seems to be a cheat, I can even sustain it, until my mind decides otherwise. WOW so cool, I like it, yes I DO. but on the other hand, when I try to be mad for no reason, it is much harder, I Have to drum up a mad thought, I have also found, when these negative feelings hit me, I can act happy, I know, I know kinda crazy, but isn’t our existence? love love all we need is love.