looks like I dodged another bullet, or in my case nightmare project. I am still broken hearted, it was going to be a nice project, until I saw the future, but just like the turtle in Mr. Wizard, I did not see it soon enough, lost my ass again, or at least did way too much work for the money.  I was conflicted in not doing the project, but today, I saw the quote I needed to see, if you need to think hard about something, the answer is NO. I hate to think this is all because of Biden and the Covid 19  issue, but think it is more the rich bitches that are doing all this, owned by the press, and we are just sheep, they make sure we are distracted in small time bullsit, wear a mask, dont wear a mask, Irish were slaves too, black lives matter, democrat, republican, whatever they can do to keep the people distracted.  I did have fun operating the excavator, and if I say so myself, I am pretty good at it. the learning curve has gotten shorter and shorter over the years, which is a good sign, as I will be 60 next year. Mom will be 80, Wow it is amazing,  we going to Maui soon too, nice to get a gig or two.  not much of a christmas this year. that kind of bums me out, I like to buy gifts, mostly for all the girls; mom, mary, sarah, and shavon. the girls in my life 🙂  I do think I the future looks brighter, with the infrastructure deal and lots of jobs, not that I will take a job, but that may keep people working, I know when I go to Arizona, the reason I went into business, was the pay and the atmosphere. unlike the democrats when trump was president, I am rooting for JOE JOE Biden, I need the work, and if he does a good job, I should do good. You know what? I am already doing good, above ground as Dorman Sinclair would say, I think it was him. I was thinking of playing winter ball, but thought wiser of that.  I need to motivate out of this hole that I am in, slump, is that more accurate? I know it is my own doing, as i can see how people are, the things they say, the clues, but I always think, I can handle it, well one thing I learned on this one, more of a down payment, at least enough to cover my labor and expenses. so I excavated the plumbing for free, shady people up in North Phoenix. O O I was going to say, you know the whole neighborly thing, the “Good People” live next to a cop, the property line is 6′ between the houses, the cop, lies to me and say, he had the curb built with a survey, fucking lying people, anyway, I already knew, it was on the “honest” people’s property, as is their block wall, but he is telling me this, so I show him where the wall is offset at least 12″ anyway, they have 6′ but it looks like they will end up within  4′ of each others houses. so he is telling me about the people who live their, with a kind of disdain, he say the previous owner was an attorney couple, but they got divorced, the wife stayed, and then sold the house to the current owners daughter in  law. (before she was the daughter in law) anyway the Mommy of these 30 year old children bought the house after it went into foreclosure.  THAT is why I want my neighbors to “stay the fuck back” this clown is into everyone’s business, I should be grateful he doesn’t live in my neighborhood, it got me to thinking, mine are not so bad, at least as this fuck.  I wish we could have 8′ high block walls, and at least a 20′ setback. he also tells me the house down the street sold for 800 grand, these are 1977 houses, block walls and all the asbestos and lead you can breathe in, not to mention a pain in the ass to remodel. I like some parts of the neighborhood, but it seems way more crowded that AJ (apache junction) and when you look up in the surrounding  sky, all you see is street lights and a barren sky, we have the superstition’s, bulldog canyon and usery mountains, I like some natural landmarks. the people look the same, old people and some young people mixed in, but way more crowded. I like the summer here when it is hot and all the snowbirds have flown the coop. its almost an hour drive, so fuel was an issue too. I could have made money, but it was not going to be a walk in the park, I gave here my 2012 prices, lower actually, I did a 1000 square ft addition up off of shea and the 100 for 180k but it had raised foundation walls, it was  a challenge, did not make much on that one either, but this one, I was going to do most of the work, in those days, I just sub or pieced out the whole project, except for some labor. well that’s all I have to wine about, I did buy some wine, it has the booze removed, but it was nice to drink, better than fake piss beer, but not as taste as ORganic Milk.

I keep thinking about staying not only healthy, but in shape, the main this is not to get hurt,  play it safer. I have slowed down, still taking the dog rollerblading, that is pretty risky, maybe I will come to my senses. it is so much fun, he bounces when he pulls and fast, the fastest dog alive, I tell him:)

other than that, looking forward to seeing mom in Hawaii. hopefully I dont get eaten by a shark, or smothered under some huge waves in the coral. I plan on taking it easy. plan at least. I was really liking the working, I was getting some good core muscles, the weights are good for bone strength, but nothing like digging and moving to get the whole body in shape, still stuck at about 178 give or take 5, amazing how much we fluctuate during the day. my brother Tollak is posting, hope he ok, he never posts. hopefully he can stay off the ladders. One of my high school buds is still going to the bering sea, I would never in a million years, thought of him as a fisherman,  a gearhead, jokester, but not a deckhand. he looking older. bad ass he is still, after all these years,  I saw that picture and got a nice chill, the darkness of the aluetants this time of year, cold, wet rain, and the birds, but he must make bank. I was thinking more of a nice salmon cruise ahahah with no net just cruise around the island in summer.  O and I found another connection to my dads dad, through his grandfather, Charles Ingram, he was a regular in kodiak, as were most fisherman, in those days, they did not have areas, they just went where the fish were, now it is in different regions. there is one pesky genetic relationship, that is related to his brother, at least on her page, but she is a larger match, that a 2nd cousin 2wice removed. ok  I Need a nap. still bummed out, I was looking forward to making some good money for a change, been working for chump change since covid hit. grateful but the bills keep coming.